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ForfatterInnlegg
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Hello everyone
Ok its time. Its time to come back and post. Who am i kidding not posting, i love it, i miss it. I miss chatting back and forth to members and i have to be accountable and keep my resolve higher. I have always liked starting new threads, out with the old in with the new is the theme for my life lately. Im not holding on to the past and i am not projecting in to the future, i am trying my best to live in today. To be happy and content with what is.
Ive had a bumpy journey, i fell a long long way down but i am climbing slowly but surely back up. Thats me, i get knocked down but i get up again. I will never give up on giving up.Im back
P
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Hi P,
Glad to see you back, it is becoming a ritual for me to look for a few names in the forum when I log in before I start reading, it was just not the same when one or two go missing. So happy to see everyone here.
There will be good days and bad days in recovery, posting on good and bad days contain a lot of invaluable lessons for everyone reading. Many are living in darkness, pain and suffering now, they would like to read up and learn how others manage to walk out of this situation.
Your presence have been a blessing to many in here. Your encouragement and comforting words has help many.
Cheers P, looking forward to your posting.
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Dear ladies
Please share this video with someone who is on the verge of giving up or feeling hopeless- Now is not the time to give up…https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpDkon5oZLc
blessings
Kin
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Hi P. It’s late here, but I just wanted to say, try not to worry about the past OR the future. Now is your moment. Enjoy it as much as is possible for you. Fill it with things that are as good for you as possible – and I don’t mean ‘things’ just in a material sense, but a chat with a friend, a lovely song, a film, a walk, work, etc etc and let the gambling go…
Best wishes,Monique
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«Wanting badly to stop gambling» can become an obsession P. Try to do things that are totally unrelated to gamble. Try not to focus on the «shuddas, cuddas or maybes». These things are outside your control. Nobody knows what the future holds.
Just record your thoughts and move on. It’s good to put those feelings on paper or in type.
When I stopped gambling in 2008 I walked miles.
I’m out of the habit of walking now but it «takes you out of your head» so try it. I need to start again too.
As Monique says , it’s NOW that matters. -
Hi P
There was a recovery slogan call seek progress, not perfection, it helps one to be realistic in recovery.
Look at the experience and knowledge u have now in recovery. Look at those days u r not gambling in the past.
U can only get better at what u r doing over time.It is like the example of the half full/ half empty glass. if I keep focusing and complain that it is half empty, not full and not perfect, I will be a very unhappy person.
If I am grateful and contented that it is half full and not empty, it changes the perspective of things.
Cheers P
Blessings
Kin
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I feel any time spent not gambling is a good time. I know that every week that goes by and I don’t gamble I have saved at least a 1000 dollars in dept that is saying a lot as the weeks build up. I may still have dept to pay but at least it won’t grow in leaps and bounds if I let the weeks add up. That makes it worth the effort for sure. I find that I still try to talk myself into going because of my on going «good behaviour» somehow trying to convince myself that I deserve the occasional evening at the casino. The problem is it will only lead me to believe I am in control and the truth is we can never be in control of something that controls us.FG
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Hi P I love your honesty. Yes you have gambled but you have always came back and started again. I think that is hard for a lot of people. Hence, someone posts a few times and we never hear from them again. I have done a lot of soul seaching the last 2 weeks and I had to be brutally honest with myself. That said, there are no more excuses that I can make or anyone else I have to blame. I think that when we take full responsibility for our actions, things start to come into place. Sometimes I hear things here that I don’t want to hear, but I always know it is because it needs to be said. I get so much from your posts. We are like a family here. I hope that everyone can beat their gambling addiction. We both know that it isn’t easy but that we are worth the fight. Keep posting P. I am always in your corner.
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you sure are putting a lot more into recovery it seems and you are looking at how to live life without the thrill it provided. We must relearn what is a normal expectation and what isn’t. Trying to find ways that will satisfy us is key. sure gambling was thrilling but it was often too short lived. The cost for the thrill way too high as well. I am trying hard to live a normal life that is full and satisfying at the same time. Last week I did have moments where I thought I could go because after all look at how much I had already saved by staying away for 21/2 months. I saw it as a real achievement and felt that in almost 9 months I spent 12 grand and that wasn’t so bad if I divided 12 in 9 it would mean I had spent 1050 each month. I told myself I could manage that. It was the 3500 I spent in one night that was wrong and if I never did that again all would be ok. I even asked my Doc what he thought about me going every now and again. He feels that I would just find myself in the same boat i was in before, it would be just a matter of time. I feel he is right and I am trying to change that dialogue that creeps in from time to time. I hope that I can continue to talk myself out of the urge all the time and hope you can too FG
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Hi P,
Beside the potential destruction that gambling can bring us, if we look at the potential happiness that gambling can offer us when we get what we wanted, it is normally very short term and never last long.
I decided to give up after considering very carefully, yes, there are winnings many times, yes I was happy but it never last before I get suck in by the gambling again and other complications set in…spending more time than I wanted, feeling anxious when I am not gambling.
The happiness many of us here get in life when not gambling are real and it is permanent. I ask myself now why do I always go for happiness that is short term when I should be going for long term happiness in life.
It also help me to look at my acting out in alcohol, work, love for money, sex, food, doctor prescribe drug, internet. The satisfaction, contentment, happiness I receive from these acting out just like gambling was short and not permanent.
Why did I give up permanent/long term happiness for short lived ones ? Why? This question bring up to the surface my stupidity, ignorant and stubbornness, I have eyes but cannot see.
I decided to change my ways, I decided to give up self-centered, selfish, self seeking ways and love my family and others more, instead of listening to me, myself and I, I turn to God.
God and you are my witness.
Cheers P
Blessings
Kin
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Dear P
A stone cutter may strike the rock 99 times with no apparent effect,
not even a crack on the surface.
Yet with the hundredth blow, the rock splits in two.It was not the final blow that did the trick,
but all that had gone before.We may pursue a goal for months without obvious results
we become convinced that we are wasting our time.
But if we continue going to meeting, share about our struggles,
taking it one day at a time, and be patient with ourselves,
We may awaken one day , to find that we have changed , seemingly overnight.I have a gut feel that all these months of faith and
hard work will made the changes possible one day.
The results would revealed themselves abruptly one day.It took us a long time to become an addict and
it may take a long time for us to recover.
we must be patient. -
Gjest
P – glad to see you back. The only way this doesn’t work if you don’t come back. Keep coming back.
I am still doing groups on Wednesday’s – same time for you. Pop in and say hi if you get the chance.
Stay strong – just today – one day at a time.
Lee
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Oh man that was close, just about blew it but got through it. I am surprised because had this happened in the past i would be sitting at a machine right now. My hubby really did help me through it and it finally diminished about an or so later. SCARY!!!
I think the hypnosis helped too on an unconscious level too.
In the end I’m trying to journal and return to some sort of normalFG -
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Thanks for your post, i decided not to post anymore. I think the posting really helped me in the first few years of being here.. probably the first five years. Its not the same anymore for me but i recommend it to newcomers it was a life saver for me. Just things change different stages, what suits one doesn’t suit another. Im happy coming to chats thats what suits me now. Love to everyone and strength in your recovery. Think of you all often.
P
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